TRT for Men is Ozempic for Women
We can always tell.
Biohacking is the talk of the town. Looksmaxxing. Cheating your mediocre genetics.
They call it “health,” but it’s really just divorced guys panicking that they can’t pick up women. Bryan Johnson is getting blood transfusions and putting on lotion instead of buying a Corvette. He’ll probably calm down now that he has a new girlfriend.
Until she leaves.
TRT is a drug that speeds up balding, makes you look kinda jacked, and keeps you perpetually 5’8.” Tall people, like yours truly, can skip it because height produces testosterone naturally for your entire life. ChatGPT told me.
It’s not just the fellas, though. Ozempic is the exact same for women, if not worse.
Women who are giddy and plump, happy and jolly, start taking Ozempic and become bitter and gaunt. Many such cases.
They pretend we can’t tell. But you can always tell. The light behind their eyes fades.
I don’t care either way if you want to be thinner or look better, naturally or unnaturally. I support vanity. I’m just saying it doesn’t work.
I can spot a woman on Ozempic from 20 miles away. Same with TRT.
Testosterone users are bald, wear medium V-neck shirts when they should be wearing XL, and always have aviator sunglasses on. They’re also somehow always standing beside a motorcycle.
You’re 62 years old. Get in your golf cart and become a grandpa. Stop lifting weights and go outside to play golf. I am famously anti-gym. We love our grandpas, folks.
When I walked by Jeff Bezos on Park Ave last year, the first thing I thought was not, “Wow, Jeff Bezos!”
It was, “Wow, that guy needs to lay off the juice.”
Juicy Jeff needs to put the needle down and maybe invest in a nice toupee if he’s serious about looking handsome. There’s only so much an unbuttoned shirt can do.
I should start a consultancy business for looking naturally perfect. But I’m a bit occupied right now trying to run for Governor of California from the East Coast.
Campaigning via Zoom from my bed isn’t an easy task. My full head of hair gets messy.
Nonetheless, I will prevail.