The Weekend is the Worst Time of Week

Go back to work, please.

Right now it’s between Christmas and New Year’s. So basically a gigantic weekend. Nobody is working. Everybody is off. And everything is more crowded, louder, slower, and inefficient.

I genuinely think we need to have a 7-Day-Workweek. Bored people are a menace. Idle minds don’t rest. They invent problems, narratives, movements, and emergencies. If there’s nothing to do, suddenly everything is an issue.

The NFL does a fantastic job sedating the masses, but it’s not nearly enough. It’s polluting my life because everywhere I go, I see jerseys. Jerseys and themed apparel everywhere. I see them so often, I’m starting to learn player names involuntarily.

This isn’t ok.

We need to put people back to work. Or at least give them something pointless but time-consuming to do. This is where AI should step in. Not to replace jobs, but to invent meaningless assignments that keep people occupied and out of my way. Fake deadlines. Fake dashboards. Endless tasks. Everyone wins.

Each person gets their own AI girlboss PM. She follows up. She schedules check-ins. She makes sure nothing of value is ever completed. The icon is just a finger wagging.

I’ve considered starting a private club for people above the common world. Think Equinox, but inverted. No fitness. No rap music. No goals. It’s called WeDon’tWork. If you have a job, you’re not allowed in.

Inside: golf simulators, hot tubs, oysters & martinis, leather seats to lounge in while dressed in suits and arguing over our USGA handicaps.

My blood pressure drops just thinking about it.